In the garage, with a shotgun, a rubber chicken, my cat, a RealDoll named Tsuki, a 6oz swordfish steak, a Captain Caveman decoder ring, a picture of the 1973 Dodgers, Zoomie's foot fetish, the occasional stripper to beat me up, 5 nicotine patches, a vial of Family Guy Anti Bacterial Soap, the occasional call from Suze, the occasional smoo, Avast AntiVirus, Mosh's Magical Marsupials, a bottle of Crisco, Spybot - Search & Destroy, the dude who pooped in the tuba, a PitBull named "Diesel", a limited edition 'Tickle Me Elmo', a Darth Vader mask, Terry Fader's turtle puppet, a bag of Ol'Roy dog food, a $5 gift certificate to "Biz-E-G's 'Lapdances and Laundry'", Lisa Lisa from the Cult Jam, the fabled "TSi CockRing Set", the new TSi "Paddle Me Palin" doll, a 250cc syringe full of empscum, a "Hello Kitty" tongue piercing kit, a pirated copy of WinRAR, a roasted turkey leg, my "Police Squad" box set, and K_o_C's non-used tube of Anal Eaze, I feel safe ...
Am I the only one that started to have this happen to them later in life? I think I was 21 when it happened to me first, and has happened many times since. I think it's cuz I don't masturbate nearly as much as I did when I was a teen. I probably spank it a few times a week nowadays but I remember when I was 14 that eight times a day was average.
Even though orgasms seem ten times better in my dreams, I'd prefer not to be constantly woken up to the need to change my undies. I mean, I could just go back to sleep but I'm not fond of having fish cock. What I hate the most is that when I'm dreaming I know I'm dreaming, and I'm aware that if I spooge than I'm gonna wake up and have to clean up. Yet, the majority of the time my "dream self" pretty much thinks "fuck it, I don't care", and does his thing. But once in a while he'll be considerate and refrain from humping whatever person, animal, or inanimate object I happen to be dreaming of at the moment.
Dude, I have wet dreams if I don't beat off enough to release my precious. I usually jack it two or three times a week. But if I wait more than a week and a half or so, undoubtedly I'll wake up with my dick stuck to my boxers. OUCH. I HATE having to get up to change out the undies. So yeah, at 28 I'm still having night jisms. I hardly ever remember my dreams though.