In the garage, with a shotgun, a rubber chicken, my cat, a RealDoll named Tsuki, a 6oz swordfish steak, a Captain Caveman decoder ring, a picture of the 1973 Dodgers, Zoomie's foot fetish, the occasional stripper to beat me up, 5 nicotine patches, a vial of Family Guy Anti Bacterial Soap, the occasional call from Suze, the occasional smoo, Avast AntiVirus, Mosh's Magical Marsupials, a bottle of Crisco, Spybot - Search & Destroy, the dude who pooped in the tuba, a PitBull named "Diesel", a limited edition 'Tickle Me Elmo', a Darth Vader mask, Terry Fader's turtle puppet, a bag of Ol'Roy dog food, a $5 gift certificate to "Biz-E-G's 'Lapdances and Laundry'", Lisa Lisa from the Cult Jam, the fabled "TSi CockRing Set", the new TSi "Paddle Me Palin" doll, a 250cc syringe full of empscum, a "Hello Kitty" tongue piercing kit, a pirated copy of WinRAR, a roasted turkey leg, my "Police Squad" box set, and K_o_C's non-used tube of Anal Eaze, I feel safe ...
Am I the only one that started to have this happen to them later in life? I think I was 21 when it happened to me first, and has happened many times since. I think it's cuz I don't masturbate nearly as much as I did when I was a teen. I probably spank it a few times a week nowadays but I remember when I was 14 that eight times a day was average.
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14372
Well, you said yourself that you aren't "even close to actively looking to get laid"; perhaps either your mind or body are telling it's time to rethink that plan ...
Even though orgasms seem ten times better in my dreams, I'd prefer not to be constantly woken up to the need to change my undies. I mean, I could just go back to sleep but I'm not fond of having fish cock. What I hate the most is that when I'm dreaming I know I'm dreaming, and I'm aware that if I spooge than I'm gonna wake up and have to clean up. Yet, the majority of the time my "dream self" pretty much thinks "fuck it, I don't care", and does his thing. But once in a while he'll be considerate and refrain from humping whatever person, animal, or inanimate object I happen to be dreaming of at the moment.
Dude, I have wet dreams if I don't beat off enough to release my precious. I usually jack it two or three times a week. But if I wait more than a week and a half or so, undoubtedly I'll wake up with my dick stuck to my boxers. OUCH. I HATE having to get up to change out the undies. So yeah, at 28 I'm still having night jisms. I hardly ever remember my dreams though.
