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lovernios
Thu Mar 16 2006, 11:53pm Print
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
One Monday morning a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual
route. As he approaches one of the homes he noticed that both cars
were in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by Bob, the homeowner,
coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles.

"Wow Bob, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night," the
mailman comments.

Bob in obvious pain replies, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This
is the first I have felt like moving since 4:00am Sunday morning. We
had about fifteen couples from around the neighborhood over for
Christmas Cheer and it got a bit wild. Hell, we got so drunk around
midnight that we started playing "Who am I?"

The mailman thinks a moment and says, "How do you play that?"

"Well all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time
with a sheet covering us and only our "privates" showing through a
hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is"

The mailman laughs and says, "Damn, I'm sorry I missed that"

"Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds. "Your name came up five
times."
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MissH
Sun Mar 19 2006, 04:19pm
MissH
Joined: Thu Jan 06 2005, 08:32pm
Posts: 3595
VERY GOOD!
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lovernios
Sun Mar 19 2006, 10:42pm
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
This thread's title is a tribute to Sesame Street's "Who are the people in your neighborhood?" portion of their program.


As someone who never thought in a million years my career would lead me to this job, the 'responsibility' one has being in the same neighborhoods on a daily basis takes on a particularly bizarre significance. But, only if one is aware of it I guess.

Take this for instance.

There is always a period where I am just Mailman X each day.
Just a random mailman driving a random mailtruck on a random street.
Driving along, at a stoplight etc, but in the process of getting to a destination essentially.
It's amazing to me how many times I have to wave at idiots, like I'm everyone's pal.
I mean, I know it's polite and all, but 95% percent of the wavers are known doofus retards that think a mailman walks on water or something. Very old doddering men do this too, as do drunken unemployable types. It's just funny to me, every time this happens it reminds me of Sesame Street and the "Who are the people in your neighborhood" bit.

I'm the people that they meet
When they're walking down the street
Each day!

It's fucking gay! Though I admit sometimes it makes me feel like a God.
Or maybe the pope.
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Seskel
Sun Mar 19 2006, 11:49pm
T-Lake's the Name
Seskel
Joined: Fri Jun 24 2005, 06:23am
Posts: 994
I think I would kind of like being waved to regularly by a bunch of strangers.
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Space
Mon Mar 20 2006, 02:23am
Space
Joined: Sat Nov 05 2005, 04:17am
Posts: 94
Kick ass, I'm going to have to repeat that one...
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Mosh
Mon Mar 20 2006, 08:07am
Rape barn owner
Mosh
Joined: Thu Jan 13 2005, 10:49am
Posts: 3586
What's wrong with these people, dont they remember Pat Sherrill?
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lovernios
Mon Mar 20 2006, 11:00pm
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
"Seskel" wrote ...
I think I would kind of like being waved to regularly by a bunch of strangers.

Dude, nobody is 'stranger' than the long-eared galoots that wave at a fucking mailman
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DaphiBlue
Tue Mar 21 2006, 01:45pm
*insert witty custom title here*
DaphiBlue
Joined: Fri Jan 07 2005, 05:26pm
Location: Right here, can't ya see me?
Posts: 499
I wave at our mailman, but then he's one of Goo's good friends so... tongue

Actually Goo jokingly acuses me of doing the mailman since our 5 year old is short and has big eyes like him :x
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Thrash
Tue Mar 21 2006, 05:41pm
Better Smokin' Than Meth!
Thrash
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14373
Jokingly?

I wave, but only if I'm walking up the street at the time ...
I don't go out of my way to do it ...
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DaphiBlue
Tue Mar 21 2006, 06:20pm
*insert witty custom title here*
DaphiBlue
Joined: Fri Jan 07 2005, 05:26pm
Location: Right here, can't ya see me?
Posts: 499
Yes jokingly! He also acuses me of doing the neighbor (gag) cause our 2 year old is blond and also about another of his friends cause our 6 year old is really tall like him. *shakes head* He hasn't come up with an alternative father for our girl yet :roll:
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Thrash
Tue Mar 21 2006, 10:49pm
Better Smokin' Than Meth!
Thrash
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14373
Tell him I'm sorry; I thought I pulled out in time.
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lovernios
Tue Mar 21 2006, 11:11pm
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
DUDES

Do you wave at RANDOM MAILMEN/WOMEN???

Hey, wave at the regular guy, or even the poor slob who subs for him/her

Not every fucking mailtruck???

If you do, you are a Sesame Street reject
or a mental midget
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Thrash
Tue Mar 21 2006, 11:28pm
Better Smokin' Than Meth!
Thrash
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14373
No, if I'm on the street, out in front smoking, or just hanging out and I see a carrier on my (semi-dead-end) street, I do ...

I don't just sit around on the porch, smiling like an inbred chimp on acid, and wave to just anything that may come by ...
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lovernios
Wed Mar 22 2006, 12:17am
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
Now yer gettin it!!!

I live in a rainforest stuffed with inbred chimps!
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Thrash
Wed Mar 22 2006, 12:46am
Better Smokin' Than Meth!
Thrash
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14373
Eek, Eek?
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Wanker
Wed Mar 22 2006, 10:21am
Killer of trolls
Wanker
Joined: Tue Feb 01 2005, 06:52pm
Posts: 104
You shouldnt wave at mailmen, they are the enemy after all. I usually bark my head off and wait for the appropriate time to lunge for the ankle.
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Mosh
Wed Mar 22 2006, 12:06pm
Rape barn owner
Mosh
Joined: Thu Jan 13 2005, 10:49am
Posts: 3586
"lovernios" wrote ...
DUDES

Do you wave at RANDOM MAILMEN/WOMEN???

Hey, wave at the regular guy, or even the poor slob who subs for him/her

Not every fucking mailtruck???

If you do, you are a Sesame Street reject
or a mental midget

Actually, I like to beat off to the mailman/woman/illegal immigrant serf.

Its relaxing and messy.
Index18lv
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Lusive
Wed Mar 22 2006, 05:18pm
Hatin' on people since 1975
Lusive
Joined: Mon Jan 10 2005, 04:29pm
Posts: 1386
I dunno. I only wave at my mailman if I know him. But then I'm a snob too.
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lovernios
Wed Mar 22 2006, 09:29pm
Misanthrope
lovernios
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
Be the snob!

Hmm. Mosh, it would thrill me to know someone was jacking off for the mailman, especially if it replaced the wave.

Note: I wear fucking black ankle sox only, none of that knee-hi gay shit.
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Seskel
Thu Mar 23 2006, 12:33am
T-Lake's the Name
Seskel
Joined: Fri Jun 24 2005, 06:23am
Posts: 994
You're right....I never wave at mailmen...strangers for the most part don't get any more than that vague head-nod from me.
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