A woman is in the kitchen, humming and just giggling all over herself. Her husband walks in and says, "What ar eyou so cheerful about?" She answers "I went to the doctor today, he said I have the breasts of a twenty year old." "What did he say about your fifty year old ass?" the husband replied. "Your name didn't come up in the conversation."
This one couple always made love (I hate that term) with the lights off... the woman kept urging to turn them on, but the husband said it was more romantic... Nevertheless, the woman was determined to have the lights on the next time they were in bed... Husband comes home the next night, and was met with a romantic dinner... After they had consumed the meal, the wife said "I want you... let's go upstairs"... They get up there and the lights stay off... They get into things, and then the wife reaches over and turns on the light to see the husband is doing her with a cucumber... "YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS... AFTER 15 YEARS OF MARRIAGE, I FIND OUT THE ENTIRE TIME WE'VE BEEN MAKING LOVE IS ALL A LIE! I NEVER WANT TO TALK TO YOU AGAIN!"
The husband looks at his wife, now in tears, and says "Would you be willing to answer me just ONE question?"
The wife, sobbing, nods...
"Good," says the husband... "How do you explain our kids?"
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
once, when I was adventurous, I went to the tanning salon with this girlfriend of mine at the time.... the overly tanned and chunky young girl working there gave me these nice goggles for my eyelids but, I decided to put them on my balls, and just closed my eyes the whole time never know about the cancer later that night, I turned the light off and went towards the bed + g/f, and she prodeeds to punch and slap me right in the balls I seems she took it for a huge dragonfly coming at her yap
